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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Buying a dog

A lonely man is browsing the pet ads in his local paper looking for a pet. He comes across an advert for an intelligent, adorable golden labrador free to a good home. He calls the number and arranges to go and see the dog.

He arrives at the house and a man lets him in.
The man asks the owner "Does the dog have a pedigree"?
The owner replies "Ask him".
"Ask him. Don't be ridiculous".
"Ask him. He's in the kitchen".
The man enters the kitchen, and sure enough there is the dog, a very handsome golden labrador.
Feeling a bit silly the man asks the dog "Do you have a pedigree?.
To his astonishment, the dog replys. "Yes I have a pedigree I'm KC registered, both my mother and father have won best of breed at crufts".He continues "I worked for customs and Excise at Heathrow airport, and I've been in several films and TV ads".
Amazed the man says to the owner "What a great dog, he talks and he's been a top sniffer dog, I don't understand - why do you want to give away such a brilliant dog?
The owner replies "I'm sick of his f**kin lies".

Cristina
 
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Just to add to that:

CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENT
>(From a recent issue, Atlanta Constitution)
>
>Single black female seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a
>very good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods,
>riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cozy winter
>nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of
>your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I'll be at the front
>door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me
>and I'm yours. Call (404) 875-6420 and ask for Daisy..
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
>(Over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society
>switchboard about an 8-week old black Lab retriever. )

Michaela
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Heres another:

Vets are expensive

A man brought a very limp dog into the veteriary clinic.
As he laid the dog on the table, Dr.Buck pulled out his stethoscope, placing the receptor on the dog's chest.
After a moment or two, the doc shook his head sadly and said,"I'm sorry, but your dog has passed away.

"What?", screamed the man. "How can you tell? you haven't done any testing on him or anything. I want a second opinion!" With that, Doc turned and left the room. In a few moments, he returned with a labrador retriever. The labrador retriever went right to work, sniffing the poor dog on the table and checking him out thoroughly.
After a considerable amount of sniffing, the retriever sadly shook his head and went "Woof".

The veterinarian then took the labrador out and returned with a cat, which walked around the poor dog several times and then sadly shook his head and said "Meow". He then jumped off the table and ran out the room.

Then the veterinarian said, " There's nothing more I can do". He handed the man the bill for £1000. The dog's owner went mad. " One thousand pounds?!?! Just to tell me my dog is dead? This is outrageous!"

Doc shook his head sadly and explained, " If you had taken my word for it , the cost would have been £50, but with the Lab work and the Cat scan........"

Cristina
 
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