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Discussion Starter #1
I know we are doing the right thing but feel so crap about it, its untrue.
My husband bought our cob about 5 years ago for our then 15 and 8 year old. Our eldest had pestered for ages and he thought it a good way to keep her away from boys, her being somewhat challenging at that age. Fast forward 5 years. Our eldest had a baby at 17 (so that didn't work) and to her credit has turned her life around and has just got into uni to become a childrens nurse. She does not however have the time or interest to ride and care for a horse. Our youngest now 13 has said she does not want to ride when she is older. My husband and I look after the horse, we don't mind looking after him or the expense, however he is bored stuck in a field with no one to ride him. After much deliberation and thought we decided to find him a new home, which we have done. We decided it better to do it now as he is only 13 rather than wait until he is too old. We have told the new people we will keep his stable on for four weeks in case thing don't work out. I am not a horsey person but he has been part of our family for 6 years and I have never given up an animal before. It goes against everything I believe in. But bearing in mind he could live for another 20 years, it is a long time to be caring for an animal no one is using when he could be giving and receiving more enjoyment to another family.
I know this is the right thing for him and us, this must be a familiar story I am sure, and I know that horses are different from cats and dogs and changing hands is part and parcel. At the end of the day we were the adults that bought him, it was perhaps our mistake and feel in some way we have let him down. :(
The new home has 15 acres and the lady is looking for a smaller horse to ride out with her son, she also teaches lessons, so hopefully he will be fine.
 
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I'm sure he'll be absolutely fine. And you're right, horses aren't like dogs. Most are more than happy as long as someone feeds, cares for and entertains them. I've only ever met one who was obsessed with her owner as most dogs are, the rest had no loyalty at all.

For years I wanted a horse of my own. I'd loaned in the past and had my heart broken many times, so when the opportunity finally arose, I bought my boy Murphy. I had 6 years of fun and adventures (often mishaps and misadventures too :lol: ) with him, all the while working with other horses to help pay for his keep. But eventually I my health meant I couldn't do all the physical work with the other horses and then it affected my ability to ride very often, so I rehomed him to a good friend. It must have taken me well over a year of struggling along, before coming to the heartbreaking decision to give him up, but I knew he'd be well looked after.

That was 10 year ago now and I still occasionally see him out and about. He looks well, is loving life and seems perfectly happy, so I've never regretted the decision, just as I'm sure you won't regret yours. 8)
 

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I used to ride and my eldest does (and is always haggling for a loan horse!!) so you are right when you say that horses are different. They change hands more often and shouldn't just be stuck in a field un ridden. Don't feel bad you are doing the right thing.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Thank you Jules, I am not even that keen on him and often refer to him as that bloody horse, but I can't stop crying I couldn't bear the thought of anything bad happening to him. He's our bloody horse if you know what I mean. I am sure he will be fine too. Thank you again you made me feel a bit better about it all xx
 

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It sounds like this is a concidered decision. I can tell your heart is in the right place as you are doing what is best for cob and not what is more convenient to you.

You want cob to have a full and happy life and you are not just fobbing him off, sounds like you know a lot about this new owner for him.

I know it must be heartbreaking but cob will be a happy horse. They are different to dogs, they don't tend to get so attached to their owners.

Hope you're ok x
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Thank you Julie and yes stormdust we have thought about it for around a year now and kept putting it off. We have visited the place he is going and made it quite clear she has four weeks to return him if he does not settle. I think its because he was only 8 when we got him and had already had 5 different owners, when then lady we bought him bought him he had been living out and his feet and general condition were not great. So feel we are the most stability he has had. He on the other hand wouldn't care if he never saw us again as long as he had a field of grass. I am hoping he will have a more useful life, he is great in traffic and a good jumper, he definitely deserves better. My daughters and hubby are fine about it. I on the other hand am the one that is allergic to him and just muck out and feed him and I am a mess with worry. Must be the mothering instinct. Thank you for your words of comfort.xx
 

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Peoples circumstances and needs change and your family is not an exception to this.

It is quite common for horses to change ownership and I see the issue being more about the suitability of the new owner and set up there. You can't guarantee the future but you can take reasonable steps to satisfy yourself re future provision and you indicate you are doing this.

Matter for you but maybe get this moved to private coffee lounge if concerned of potential repercussions of family seeing your open comments here.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Thank you, would the private coffee lounge be a more appropriate place for this post? sorry I am rusty at this... how would I move it? Thank you
 

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It's a matter for you- I was only considering potential fallout if your offspring read the above.

If wanting to move it I would click on the report button on your 1st post then add brief comment, (ask for it to be moved to avoid family conflict for you). That process should cause an email to be sent to each Mod/admin & thus hopefully quicker than sending a sole PM to a Mod.(hopefully this advice is o.k. with mods/admin).
 

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sounds as though your making the right choice and you know that all will be good in the end .
choices like this are so hard but dont feel bad your doing it for the right reasons
good luck :)
 

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Discussion Starter #12
Our cob has gone to his new home, despite not going in a horse box for six years, he just trotted in. I know we have done the right thing but tbh feel pretty crap about it.
 
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